Bathroom jokes
Toilet paper cried across the road.
My sister just sits on the toilet with her iPad, then I go to do something at the sink and she says, "Bella, give me toilet paper!" Then I am annoyed, like super annoyed.
How do you poop?
Why couldn't the toilet paper cross the road? Because it got stuck in a crack!
The toilet having an argument with the toilet paper, the owner of the house had diarrhea, who's day was more shittier!?
HOLY CRAP!!!
Crap with holes in it.
Get it? HOLE - Y?
A woman once didn't return home for the night, and the next morning when she arrived home, her husband started questioning her about where she had been. She lied, saying she slept at one of her friends' houses.
The man proceeded to call all her friends, all of whom denied her sleeping at their places the previous night.
Meanwhile, somewhere else, a man didn't return home to his wife for the night either. The following morning, his wife started questioning him, and he lied, saying he slept at a friend's house. She proceeded to call all his friends. All of them said that he indeed slept at their places the previous night, and one of them even insisted that he's still there, but he's using the bathroom and he can't talk right now!
The other day all those toilet papers came by my house and asked do I have any crack candy. Naw, I don't have no damn crack candy or no crack apples. All I have here in the backyard is a peanut butter crack sandwich. Help yourself, and while you're at it, clean up all the damn doggie dodo that's everywhere. Thank you, Mr. Toilet Papers.
Pooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooop!
A man with 20 dollars walked into Dave & Buster's. He went to the bathroom to wash his hands. He walked out without any clothes but still has his money.
Why is your mom's butt so smelly? Cause she wipes poorly.
How do you make a blind girl smile? Leave the plunger in the toilet.
So, I got a paper towel roll, ripped it, but started to fart when I ripped it off, and stopped farting when I got it off the roll, and then I said, "I guess that's why it's called ripping one!"
Why did not the toilet paper make it across the road to escape the corono virise?
What’s the first thing you should do if an epileptic is having a seizure in the bathtub?
Throw in your dirty laundry!
So I walked into my bathroom to clean some stuff, and no one ever told me you can't put phones in the bathtub!
Why did the Octopus go down the toilet?
Because he had a toilet call in the drain.
Why did the human eat cereal in the bathroom?
So he could querk.
Why did the mop lick the floor of the bathroom? Because it was so poopy.
How do you surprise a blind kid?
Put a plunger in the toilet.