Appearance jokes

Yo mama so ugly that on Halloween she didn't get candy.

NEWS: A man kidnapped a 13-year-old girl.

MOM OF GIRL: The man had a shady face and a receding hairline.

My wife is so ugly when she was born, the doctor said, "I did everything I could, but she pulled through anyways." When she was born, the doctor hung himself with the umbilical cord. He pushed her back in, said, "Not done." The doctor slapped her mother. The doctor looked at her and said, "Twins!" He didn't know what end to slap. He threw her away and kept the afterbirth.

Why do people with Down syndrome always look funny?

It’s their funny face.

Doc: Can I help you?

Girl: Doctor, I have pain in my heart.

Doc: When did it begin?

Girl: Right now (seeing him like a doll).

Doc: Hh...do you like me? I know I am handsome...

Girl: No, don’t get me wrong. You just look like someone I know.

Doc: Who is that? Is your boyfriend?

Girl: No, it’s my pet (rabbit), his name is Rokie.

Kim Jong-Un thicc af.

Girls with the name Carley have the biggest forehead on the earth, I mean, moon.

Wanna hear a joke?

Your face.

I have 3 eyes, 2 ears, and 6 mouths, what am I?

UGLY!

Good morning, madam. I am from the local council. Can you please tell me if you have a dog license for that poodle you have on your head?

My cousin called me ugly.

Well, I'm pretty sure 90% of her looks could be wiped away with a Kleenex.

Your hairline is so far back your mom can't cut it.

Omg wassup dude, why does your hair look just like a young Whoopi Goldberg from "The Color Purple?" Them damn stanky looking corn bread rows on your head; you look like a damn cheetah pet. Che che che cheetah, they available at Wal-Mart, Dollar Tree, Target, and Kroger.

What's the difference between Vikkstar and a tree?

Nothing. They're both hollow on the inside and brown on the outside.

Yo mama so ugly, when she went to the ugly club, they said, "Sorry, professionals only!"

A skeleton had a job interview, but he looked messy.

I had to fix his collarbone.

Your hairline's less straight than my dad's.

Your hairline is so bad that the queen died when looking at it!

Your forehead is so big that I can’t even see your hairline, and your stupid forehead face.

Your hairline is so far back that it would be a 70 mile trip to the back.