Appearance jokes

Your hairline is so far back your mom can't cut it.

My cousin called me ugly.

Well, I'm pretty sure 90% of her looks could be wiped away with a Kleenex.

Omg wassup dude, why does your hair look just like a young Whoopi Goldberg from "The Color Purple?" Them damn stanky looking corn bread rows on your head; you look like a damn cheetah pet. Che che che cheetah, they available at Wal-Mart, Dollar Tree, Target, and Kroger.

Good morning, madam. I am from the local council. Can you please tell me if you have a dog license for that poodle you have on your head?

Yo mama so ugly, she had to ask Satan to help her give birth!

Yo mama so ugly, when she went to the ugly club, they said, "Sorry, professionals only!"

I have fuck and sex with all the sexy naked ladies and they suck my balls (penis), but you ain't have no girlfriend. Your only friend, they call him ching chong coz of your hairline.

You're so bald, when you wear a turtleneck, you look like one!

His hairline doing the moonwalk. Oh, I forgot, he doesn’t even have a hairline.

Your hairline is so bad that the queen died when looking at it!

Your forehead is so big that I can’t even see your hairline, and your stupid forehead face.

Your mum is so ugly she made Paul Walker run.

A customer asked me to look at their hairline. I time traveled back to the dinosaurs.

Your hairline is so far back that it would be a 70 mile trip to the back.

Your hairline is so bad that the Teen Titans gave up.

Your hairline's less straight than my dad's.

I bet when your mom first saw you, she said, "Oh my god, this ain't my child. My child would look amazing."

Friend, you so faaaat.

Me: Boy, at least I'm not built like a Nintendo Switch.

What do you call a person with no eyebrows?

Ms. Burgos.

A skeleton had a job interview, but he looked messy.

I had to fix his collarbone.