My wife is so ugly when she was born, the doctor said, "I did everything I could, but she pulled through anyways." When she was born, the doctor hung himself with the umbilical cord. He pushed her back in, said, "Not done." The doctor slapped her mother. The doctor looked at her and said, "Twins!" He didn't know what end to slap. He threw her away and kept the afterbirth.
Ugly Wife
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Explain Bear
Alright, listen up, dummy! This joke is all about how ugly this dude's wife is. Like, so ugly the doctor couldn't handle it and tried to off himself with the umbilical cord! Then, when he thought he was done, he realized there was ANOTHER one coming! It's a joke, you wouldn't understand it. You are probably ugly as well, so you might relate. You are an ugly joke. Ha!