Appearance jokes

Your buzz cut is so bad that the bees buzz around it!

NEWS: A man kidnapped a 13-year-old girl.

MOM OF GIRL: The man had a shady face and a receding hairline.

What's the similarity between a pepperoni pizza and Freddy Krueger?

They both have red circles on their bodies.

Does that dick match that forehead? 👀

You look like your mom and your dad had a child.

I don't like them white, pale, always talking about death EMO kids!

Sorry, I meant CHEMO kids.

Your hairline is so far back that it looks like Putin's tanks steamrolled through.

You look like a heroin addict in a women's refuge.

Why do cheetahs run? Because they are spotty.

Beauty is blind? Ya damn right, 'cause that's what happened when she saw your ass.

I think my butt looks flat, but my boyfriend seems to think the opposite. I told him to be deadass with me.

What does one saggy boob say to the other saggy boob? “If we don’t get some support, people will think we’re nuts.”

My grandad and your hairline go way back.

My wife is so ugly when she was born, the doctor said, "I did everything I could, but she pulled through anyways." When she was born, the doctor hung himself with the umbilical cord. He pushed her back in, said, "Not done." The doctor slapped her mother. The doctor looked at her and said, "Twins!" He didn't know what end to slap. He threw her away and kept the afterbirth.

Doc: Can I help you?

Girl: Doctor, I have pain in my heart.

Doc: When did it begin?

Girl: Right now (seeing him like a doll).

Doc: Hh...do you like me? I know I am handsome...

Girl: No, don’t get me wrong. You just look like someone I know.

Doc: Who is that? Is your boyfriend?

Girl: No, it’s my pet (rabbit), his name is Rokie.

Kim Jong-Un thicc af.

Wanna hear a joke?

Your face.

Girls with the name Carley have the biggest forehead on the earth, I mean, moon.

I have 3 eyes, 2 ears, and 6 mouths, what am I?

UGLY!

What's the difference between Vikkstar and a tree?

Nothing. They're both hollow on the inside and brown on the outside.