Animal jokes
What do you get when you kill a brown chicken and brown cow?
Dead chicken and dead cow.
What do sea turtles and lesbians have in common?
They both choke on plastic.
Yo mama so fat, cow!
What do you call an octopus whose father left?
An octopie.
Stop saying "cheetah cheater" jokes. They suck!
Memes
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Because fuck society, that's why!
Knock knock.
Who's there?
The butt.
The butt who?
The butt goes mooooo!
How many tickles does it take for an octopus to laugh?
I do not understand why people aren't scared of spiders. I mean, like they have 87447924872320984623879480327678987388025873289576348097923408370983728 legs and 23864867759578590893839420387424763478923748394783294327428748243264278 eyes.
I saw a spider in my room. YOU THINK I'M GONNA SLEEP IN THERE?????????
Nope. I'm moving to Japan.
KONNICHIWA
Why did the octopus cry?
Because his mum said he looked like Johnny Depp.
Sister, can I see your two big rabbits?
Does chocolate milk come from black cows?
Do you know how a snail has a "nail," why can't it be a nut?
What do you call an alligator detective??
An investi-gator.
Why don't Chinese people play cricket?
Because they ate all the bats!
Would you rather:
Fight Mike Tyson
Or
Lick an elephant's butt after it took a crap with diarrhea?
Hey anime girl, I hope you know that Jayden is a boy and we got back together.
Hahahaha, you never had a chance, so hahahaha!
Q: What’s a koala's face song? A: Never gonna give you up BECAUSE it hangs on the tree and the person is the tree?
What do you call a grey, fat, and very old unicorn?
A rhino.
I went outside to catch some dog, but I mist.