Animal jokes
What do you call a dog with no legs?
It don't matter what you call it, 'cause it ain't gonna come to you.
What do you call a pig who does karate?
Pork chop!
Why are chickens so funny? Because...
Why did the cow go to space? To go to the moon.
What’d the fox say when he was asked to describe his wife? “Hottie hottie hottie hoe!”
Meet your new evil overlord
Leo is more useless than a HEDGEHOG with ALOPECIA.
Vital information: if you find a stray dog in an alleyway, don't stare at its eyes.
What do you call a llama that was in 9/11? Osama Bin Llama.
What does a cow say when he remembers something?
"I have deja moo!"
What is a panda's favorite cooking implement?
A pan-duh.
What did the chicken say after he died? Nothing.
What do you call a lesbian dinosaur?
Lickalotofpuss.
What do you call a female octopus? An octopussy.
I got a horse and I named it Hermio-nae.
A magician walks up to a girl and asks her to feel the rabbit in the magician's hat.
The magician asks the girl to rub the rabbit. The girl notices the rabbit sticks up and drools; the hat was covering the hips.
Octopus.
What do you call an elephant and a rhino mix?
Helliphino!
What do you call a three-humped camel? Pregnant.
Why do cats like to sing? They're very mewsical!
What is large, grey, and it doesn't matter? An Irrelephant! Hahahahahahahahaha! Hahaha!