Animal jokes
Why would you leave a damn gorilla out in the middle of the parking lot after you let the zookeeper bring a chimpanzee home from the zoo because me and the gorilla had too much to drink?
What animal can't you trust with your homework?
A: A cheetah!
What's a snake's favorite subject?
Well, there are two: hisss-tory, but some prefer maths; those weirdos are adders.
What kind of milk does a new age calf drink?
Dairy free.
What is a rat's favorite dessert?
A chocolate mousse cake.
What do you call a one-legged hippo?
A hoppo!
What do you get if you cross a zebra and a donkey?
Zeedonk.
What did the Canadian say when a guy shot his beaver?
"It is ok, I forgive you."
How do u catch a tame rabbit?
The tame way.
Not all cat puns are purr-fect; some just have their claws.
Where do you find a cow with no legs?
Right where you left it!
What do cows listen to?
Moo-sic.
Why was the egg naughty? Because he wanted a good cracking!
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Fffffsshhhhhh
What do pigs and ink have in common?
They both go in a pen.
What did the bull say when he went to college?
Bison!
On which side does the chicken have the most feathers?
On the outer side. 😂😂
Okay, One time I there was my dog. But then the dog, it fell.
Then I f**ked my dog hard in the a**.
Why do cows wear bells?
Because their horns don’t work.
Did you hear the story about the eel? It was shocking! 😂😂😂😂😂