Animal jokes
Why did the duck get arrested? For selling quack.
What did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the other side. 😂😂😂
I once had an owl who I thought it would fly away.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Cow.
Cow who?
Cow don't go who, they go moo!
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
An interrupting cow.
And inter-moo!
Knock, knock.
"Who's there?"
Cow says,
"Cow says who?"
No! Cow says moo!
I was at school one day, and my teacher gave me homework. Once I got home, I did not do my homework, but I watched TV. After the movie, I finally went to go do my homework. I was almost done with my homework when I got to the last question. I didn't know the answer, so I asked the closest living being to me, which was my dog, and I asked him: what's two minus two? He said nothing.
The other day a squirrel asked me for a job. I asked him, "What jobs did you have previously?"
Calmly he answered, "I am a pilot. I can pick it up from here and pile it over there. I also can fly a sign!"
"Too bad, this is a nut cannery, and we're 100% automated. We don't need anyone at this time, sorry."
"No worries, I'm totally nuts anyway. Guess I'll fly a sign across town, don't have bus fare!"
What do you call a rabbit who is really cool?
What is black, white, and red all over?
A dead zebra 🦓
What's black, white, and "read" all over?
A zebra after a lion is full.
What do you call a cow with three legs?
My ex.
What do big fat male cows have?
Moobs.
The early bird might get the worm...
But the second mouse gets the cheese.
What do you get when you stuff some cows into a food container?
A can o' bull.
Me and my friend roasting each other.
Friend: You look like a baboon.
Me: Stop talking, you look like a gorilla, so I might call animal control on you and I'll be seeing you at the zoo!
I named my dog Chicken.
I love eating chicken.
What do you call a chicken with no legs? Ground chicken 🤣💀🐔 Get WRAY'DDDDD!
When you mix a wizard, a rabbit, and a songwriter together, you get 24 carrot magic.
What is the best type of snake?
A dead one.