What has two legs and is red all over?
Half a cat.
Animal Jokes
Why did the zebra cross the road?
Because he wanted to go to the Shell station.
Why did the duck get arrested? Because he was selling quack.
When a donkey digs a tunnel, it is called a burro.
What did the hungry Dalmation say when he had some kibble?
That hit the spot!
What time is it when a cow sits on your fence? Time to get a new fence!
People say dogs are like their owners. So true. My dog keeps on running into the street as if she doesn't care about her life.
I don't care about her life either hahahaha!! :)
What’d the fox say when he was asked to describe his wife?
“Hottie hottie hottie hoe!”
Two cows were hiding.
One said: "Moooo."
The other one said: "Shut up! We're hiding!"
Why isn't a koala a bear? It doesn't have the koalafications.
What do you call an Italian dog?
A labra-noodle.
What do you call a dog that fell into the Porta-Potty?
A Corgi Potty.
Why do Indians marry cows? Because they bathe in milk.
Top ten dog breeds:
10. Dogs
9. Are
8. Beautiful
7. Animals
6. And
5. Judgement
3. Is
2. Cruel
1. Dachshund
Q: Why did the duck cross the road?
A: To get to the other side.
What did a jockey's manager say to him before the race?
"Use the horse!"
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Why?
To get to the idiot's house.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
The chicken.
How do birds pay? With their bills!
What do you call a retarded cow?
Vegan (vegetable).
What do you call a duck that is addicted to drugs?
A quack head!
My mom must be a duck then...
