Animal jokes
What do you get when you mix a fly and a rabbit?
Bugs Bunny!
What do you get when you cross a turkey and a centipede?
Drumsticks for everyone!
What did the frog order?
A diet Croak!
One day, a chicken went to the nail store. He asked the "owner" where the shampoo was. "BRO IM NOT THE FRIKKIN MANAGER!" the guy said. So the duck walked away.
The next day he went back to the store and asked a pregnant lady why she was so fat. The lady punched him and ran away. The duck cried. Then he went to the lady's husband and said that he must be tired of being married since she punches people every day. The man punched him. The duck assumed they were the punching couple. The duck walked, and then fell in a ditch and stayed there to die. The pregnant lady and her husband were very pleased >:) muhahahahahahaha
Why did the boy get a koala? He had the koalafications.
What did the bull say when got hit in the special area? "Damn my bulls!" Ahahaha
Why can't we see a camel?
Because it's camelflauged!
What do you say to your pony when it's being wild?
Stop horsing around!
What do you call a female octopus? An octopussy.
Why did the chicken go to the restaurant?
To eat chicken!
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Suicide.
What is a cow?
Q: My scale had my phone number on it. Wandering why, I looked up only to see an elephant in my face...
What did the fish say when he hit the wall?
Dam!
Teacher: What's your favorite animal?
Me: Desert Eagle.
Teacher: Why?
Me: 'Cause it fits in my backpack.
Child: Mom, someone told me you talk like an owl.
Teacher: Who?
Child: Oh, it is true, you do talk like an owl!
What do you get when you cross a lawn mower and a parakeet?
Shredded tweet!
We just got a new chicken-proof lawn. It's impeccable.
What does a gay horse eat?
Haaaaaaay!
Why did the fastest cat get kicked out of school?
He was a cheetah.