Aed jokes
What do you call finding half of a worm?
Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh moan for me.
What did Nicki Minaj say when she sat next to a bomb?
"Bang bang right through the roof. Bang bang all over you."
What do you call an emo that likes pizza? A pizza cutter.
What did the fish get on his math test?
A sea plus.
What’s the worst part of being a pedophile?
Getting the blood out of your clown suit.
W E D N E S D A Y
How can all rape be prevented? Just teach your daughters to never say no to a man. There - fixed!
POV there’s a school shooting.
American: First time, European?
European: Yeah, you American?
American: No, not my first time.
Joe Mama has a chode.
Last time I got a piece of ass was when my finger went through the toilet paper.
What do you call a rare fart in Egypt? A toot uncommon!
This isn't a joke, but I'm a survivor and use humor to cope. I find these extremely funny, so please leave the people writing these alone 😭
Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooob!
A professor was talking about the American dream. Then, he asked the German exchange student if there was a German dream, to which the student replies, "We did, but no one liked it."
What do you call a lady with a pyramid on her head?
mummy
A man was reported stealing a bar of soap from a corner store. The police concluded that he made a clean getaway.
What is a mouse’s 🐭 favorite side order?
Cheese Fries 🍟😋
What did the parents rearrange the furniture to punish a child?
Guess he was a stupid blind motherfucker 🖕 that didn't even know how to use a cane to figure out where they put the furniture.
So a woman was paranoid, so she had a dog to check to see if anything was wrong. She would always stick her hand under the bed, and if the dog licked her hand, then she was safe. One night, just before bed, she stuck her hand under the bed. She felt a lick, so she went to bed. In the middle of the night, she needed to go to the bathroom. So, she walked into the bathroom, and on the window, it said: "HUMANS CAN LICK TOO!" Then she was murdered.
Want to know why parents don't get school shooting jokes?
Because they are aimed at a younger audience.
What's a goat's favorite video game?
Mario Goat Cart!