Aed jokes

I stole a wheelchair from a disabled kid. What is he going to do, stand up?

What did Michael Jackson say when he became a triangle? Tetraheehee!

Unknown be like: "Wah wah, I'm too scared to talk to girls in real life, so I bully random tweens I find online to make me feel better... what a shame."

What is big, black, and hairy? It's a gorilla with a machine gun.

Q: What can turn a fruit into a vegetable?

A: AIDS.

What does a person that’s high and Helen Keller have in common?

Both stare off into space.

I went up to a kid and asked, "Are you an orphan?" They said, "Yes, what gave me away?" I said, "Your parents."

Cow A: I slept with your sister!

Cow B: Never knew my brother was a girl!

All the other cows:

:O

I would try to make a Fortnite joke, but I can't seem to build on it.

A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel on his pants, a peg leg, and a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender says, "Hey, you’ve got a steering wheel on your pants."

The pirate says, "Arrrr, I know. It’s driving me nuts."

I was going to an expensive dinner with my friend's girlfriend because she really wanted to go, but he just got out of surgery, and he said take care of her, so I said, "Will do, bro. I’ll bring her back fuller than a topped-up water bottle."

Why did Steven Hawkins die?

Because he got a virus.

There was a guy how had a stroke, eh.

He's all right.

Why can't you tell a joke in a corn maze?

Because there's too many ears.

American: How do you use a PC?

Amish: We use a potato.

What's worse than throwing a baby off a cliff?

Catching it with a pitchfork.

A guy and a woman are walking into a forest. The woman says she is lonely. The guy then says, "Don't worry, there will be a third person in a little while."

Don’t fart in an Apple Store.

It has no Windows.

What's the difference between a blonde and a bowling ball?

I can only fit three fingers inside the bowling ball.

What's Juice Wrld's favorite salad? A seizure salad.