Aed jokes

What do you call a cow with two legs?

Lean beef.

What do you call a cow with no legs?

Ground beef.

There was a blackout in my neighborhood last night. The police told us to stay inside until they shot him.

Donald Trump didn't build a wall because he likes going to islands to touch little girls.

Are you a school? Because I want to shoot kids inside you.

What is 3 feet tall and sits at the bottom of children's beds?

A: Garry Glitter's boots.

Q: Why can't the orphan buy Robux?

A: He could not use his mother's credit card.

What's the difference between Batman and a gay person?

Batman has no one to call "daddy."

Welcome to Jimmy's orphanage and pizza shop, where today's loss is a sauce. How may I help you?

"Among Us" is a game (Skeld) where there is an imposter trying to hijack the ship and kill everyone. Does this sound similar to September 11, 2001?

What does the receptionist at a sperm bank say as clients leave?

Thanks for coming!

Me: I just came home from Africa, and guess what I saw.

Friend: I don't know.

Me: A black market.

Did Jesus die a virgin? No, he got nailed before he died.

How do you tell if a blond is really stupid?

Put a scratch and sniff on a bleach pod.

As tragic as school shootings are, it's also a quick way to a late-term abortion.

If they made a movie about your sex life, what would the title be?

Mine would be "Alien Vs. Predator."

What’s the difference between an emo kid and a dead pig?

Suicide squad.

What’s the difference between Stephen Hawking and a refrigerator?

The fridge actually runs.

Everyone, take off your pride flags; it's already a new month.

Since Christopher Reeves can't play Superman, they got a new person: Christopher Walken.

I hate when people make jokes about the Twin Towers.

My dad died on 9/11. He was a great pilot.