Aed jokes
Dentist: “This will hurt a little.”
Patient: “OK.”
Dentist: “I’m having an affair with your wife!”
If a homeschooled kid shoots his parents, does that count as a school shooting?
Q: What did the kid say to the emo kid?
A: Don't leave me hanging!
If I throw a paper airplane at two twins, did I cause 9/11?
Wanna hear a joke...
I don't know, I'm too high.
What’s the difference between a dog and parents?
If an orphan calls their name, only the dog comes back.
I went to an emo kid who just got a haircut, and instead of saying, "Like your cut, G," I slapped his arm and said, "I like your cuts, G."
Me as a 5-year-old: How do you relate to the Twin Towers?
Friend: What?
Me: Every time I think of them, I feel sad.
What do you get when you cross a mosquito with a mountain climber?
Nothing. You can't cross a vector and a scalar.
Imagine being expelled from school for bringing a weapon to school.
What’s the difference between a violin and a viola?
The viola burns longer.
What do Myspace and my dad have in common?
I haven't seen them in a while.
So, as a school shooter, I try to remember my ABC's. A, B, C, D, E, F, GUN!
And I basically stop at G, since no students ever speak to me about the rest.
What do you call a bunch of white guys sitting on a bench?
The NBA.
Are you happy to see me, or is that a bomb strapped to your chest and a detonator in your hand?
What do you call a protest that gets crowded?
Human trafficking.
Learn math the easiest way from Pendu.
Multiplying any number by 0 is 0 itself.
Hint: Multiplying any number by Pendu's G/A in 2022 is 0 itself.
The answer is 0.
What do you call a genderless child?
It's not a mister, it's not a misses, I'm more for a mystery.
Yo mama so dumb that when she saw the "log in" page on her computer, she went and put a log in it.
A boxer talks with his fists.
Stephen Hawking talks with his wheelchair.