Aed jokes
I had a boyfriend once. He broke up with me because he "wanted to be more alive." I guess it didn't work when he went to my basement.
What is the best way to end a cookbook?
And that’s a wrap!
Once a mustang, always a mustang. - Mr. Shaw
Why was the dog staying in the shade?
Because it didn't want to be a hot dog!
Did you hear about the guy that went to a nudist colony? The first day was his hardest.
What did the kangaroo 🦘 bring to the cookout?
A jump rope!
An action hero stops a man running by throwing a tire at him.
What is his one liner? "I told you to stop running or you will get tired."
You're so trash that when I dropped you off, I got a ticket for littering.
When you donate a kidney, you are a total hero, everyone loves you.
When you donate five kidneys though, people start yelling, the police gets called--sheesh!
Did you hear about the actor who fell through the floorboard?
Don't worry, he was just going through a stage.
What does a bullet and milk have in common? They both take out your dad.
What's red all over and spins at 100 mps?
Baby in a blender.
What do you call a devil texting you? Travelers on the way. 😈🤣
I’d make a joke to Fetty Wap on this, but there’s only a 50/50 chance he’ll SEE this.
Think about you are so fucking high that you are walking to a lift and inside the lift are stairs. 🤣🤣🤣🤣
How can you tell a bow n' arrows scared?
He starts to quiver! ;)
What is a vegetarian's favorite song?
No beef.
What do you call a black man in the army in camo? Incogneggo.
What does a burnt pizza, cold beer, and a pregnant woman have in common?
Someone didn’t pull it out in time.
What do you call a man with a Johnny on his nose? Fuck nose.