Aed jokes
What did the Canadian say when a guy shot his beaver?
"It is ok, I forgive you."
What do you call someone with no arms and no legs?
A nugget.
What can you say in bed and in piano class? Im fingering A Minor
Q: Why are lesbians bad at math?
A: Because they can't multiply.
This guy came into my library a year ago and borrowed a book named "How to Commit Suicide." He never returned it.
Why didn't the sun go to college?
Because it already had a million degrees!
A gay wizard went to a bar and disappeared with a poof!
So the other day my black friend and I were working on a group project. He was so slow so I whipped him to make him faster.
Came across the headline this morning whilst reading the paper...
"Woman beats off Rapist in carpark!"
I suppose that was a fair compromise!
TJ GWEN just shut the hell up.
NOT A DATING WEBSITE
One day at school, Little Johnny and his friends were asked to do a sheet of paper which said, “Put a matching word from the word bank into the slot in the sentence that makes it make sense.” But when the teacher marked Little Johnny's papers, she asked why he put the word "bank" in every slot. And he says, “Well teacher, you said to put a word from the word bank and that's one word! So I had no choice but to put down that word!”
One day I was texting my friend on Roblox and I made her mad. She told me she was gonna kill me.
That night, she told me to meet her at the bathroom at 2 PM sharp, but she made "sharp" in all caps. So I went to the bathroom at 2 PM the next day. Now I know what she meant by "SHARP" on Roblox... she brought a knife, and I was in hell by then. Like for the next part!
What is a bus 🚌?
Q: How can you tell if a Western is gay?
A: All the good guys are hung.
What kind of bath bomb does an emo person use?
A toaster.
What does a stray cat/dog have in common?
Both of them don't have a home!
So this one time I saw Sally trying to get up after she fell off the swing, and I helped her up and she said "Thank you," and I said, "You're welcome." The next day I saw her legs and someone said, "I would not do that," and I said, "Whatever." I tapped Sally, and the top halve fell. I said, "WHAT HAPPENED TO SALLY?" And someone said she went in a minefield.
Q: What did the stop light say to the other stop light?
A: Stop looking, I’m changing!
Why was Michael Jackson kicked out of boy scouts? He was up to a pack a day!
Boy: "Hey mom, can we have ice cream?"
Orphan: "What's a mom?"