Aed jokes

What will you call Burj Khalifa after 100 years?

"Bujurg" Khalifa. (Just a joke)

What's the difference between a baby and a mansion?

I've never seen the inside of a mansion.

What is it about a beard and glasses that children find so sexy?

Sister: (moaning) Go get Mom, she'd love this!

Me: But Billy's with her right now.

Billy: UGHHHH...MMMMM

Dad: Hurry up Billy, I want to see you for a moment.

Q: What did the skeleton say when he proposed to his girlfriend?

A: Will you marrow me?

A little boy was given a bicycle and a soccer ball for his birthday, but why was the little boy unhappy?

Because the little boy had no legs.

I got my little girl a hand sewing kit for her birthday and she cried. I didn't understand why until I realized that she had no hands to sew with.

What did Hitler get for his 6th birthday?

A Kewpie burger and an Easy-Bake Oven.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You a dumb a** b*tch, We all know it's true.

What do you call a man with a curly toe?

Carlito.

"Suicide is a murder, and my body should go to jail."

Why does an orphan play GTA to be wanted? 😂😭

How are a bald eagle and a bald man similar?

Because they both have eyes.

What did the man say to the woman? "Make me a sandwich."

Do you have a shovel in your back pocket?

Why?

'Cause I’m digging that ass.

If you put a million monkeys at a million keyboards, one of them will eventually write a Java program.

The rest of them will write Perl programs.

Why can orphans not grow big and strong? Because they need a parent to buy them steroids.

Why did the cat meow?

Because it's a cat, and they meow.

I work with animals!

What do you do?

I’m a butcher.

So I was on a Discord call the other day, and one of my friends, an American buddy, joined, and we had a conversation.

Until they said: "When did pounds change to quid?"

And I said: "They're the exact same thing."

Then they said: "But when did it happen?"

So I said: "When did school change to shooting range?"