Aed jokes
It's not surprising there isn't a whole lot of good tree jokes.
Most foresters have a wooden personality.
My friend wasn't open to the idea of me becoming a nudist.
I told him to stop being so clothes-minded.
What do you get when Cayden steals your sandwich? A knuckle sandwich.
How do you get a cow to eat?
Give it mooshrooms!
If someone with a lisp dropped a hammer on their foot, would they be Thor?
Why does a woodpecker have a beak?
So as to not smash his head against the tree.
What do you call a train that likes toffee?
A chew-chew train.
What do you call a person with no arms or legs at your front door? Mat.
I would tell you a science joke, but I know I won't get a reaction.
Q: What did the chemist say when he found two isotopes of Helium?
A: HeHe.
Your face is a joke.
A seal walks into a club.
How do you scare a bee?
Boo-bee!
[God creating a jellyfish]
God: How about an evil bag?
Why can't bugs drive... because they don't have a LICE-ens...
BA-DUM CHHH!
Q: Why did the family want to move out while the neighbors were playing tennis?
A: Because they were a racquet!
What do you call a person who's afraid of Santa?
Klaustrophobic.
I went scuba diving last year. It was fun, but at the end, I ran out of oxygen.
It was a breathtaking experience.
Q. What monster plays the most April Fools' pranks?
A. Prankenstein.
Velcro is such a rip-off.