Helium jokes

Why is helium so expensive? It is due to inflation.

Hey John, how are you going?

Helium, yeah good, what about you?

(Hey Liam)

What kind of air does Ariana breathe?

Helium?

Q: What do you do with a sick chemist?

A: If you cannot helium, you have to curium. If you cannot curium, you have to barium!

Q: What did the chemist say when he found two isotopes of Helium?

A: HeHe.

I've just started a new business making people breathe in large amounts of helium. They all speak very highly of it.

What is Michael Jackson's chemical? The HE-HE-lium.

I heard helium won the lottery. Turns out, he lied.

A piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner.

"Oh, Bunsen, my flame," the sodium swooned. "I melt whenever I see you!"

The Bunsen burner replied, "Calm down. It's just a phase you're going through."

What does a doctor do to make you better?

Helium.