Aed jokes
What did Cinderella do when she got the ball?
She gagged and took it like a champ.
Q: What did Donald Trump say after America gave him the boot?
A: What am I supposed to do with one boot?
Can we stop talking about 9/11? I lost my dad in it.
He was a great pilot.
I would make a joke about your mom, but cows are sacred in my country.
I believe in a woman's right to choose...
...whether she wants to cook first and then clean or clean first and then cook.
What's the only thing with 4 legs Asians don't eat? A table.
I'm glad I'm not a pornstar... that would be pretty sucky.
What's an orphan's favorite game?
GTA, because they're actually wanted? Lol.
"I'm sorry" and "I apologize" mean the same thing. Except at a funeral.
What is a paedophile's favorite thing about Halloween?
Free delivery XD
How do you punish a blind man?
Leave the plunger in the toilet.
What is red and very rare?
A child in a blender.
What's the difference between my wife and a battery? I can't use a battery when it dies.
Q: How do you make a door cry?
A: Twist its knob.
Q: Have you ever felt a window?
A: Did you feel the pane?
Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom?
Because the "p" is silent.
I talked to a future suicide bomber. I told him, "ISIS ain't got sh** on me because I planted a bomb and lived."
Q: What's the best thing about fucking 28 year olds?
A: There's 20 of them.
Let’s say there’s a person who should have never come to exist. How would you find them?
A: Look in a mirror.
When is a door not a door? When it's ajar.