Aed jokes

I joined an emo class today. The first lesson I learned was slice and dice and let it flow.

Why isn't the Moon Emo anymore?

Turns out it was just a phase.

Why are orphans so happy on Christmas? Because they might get a family.

A cow is an earthquake, it's a milkshake.

Q: Why did the trans man only eat salads?

A: Because he is a "herbefore."

What’s the difference between a prostitute and a homeless shelter?

You can shit a load inside of a prostitute, but if you try it in a shelter, you get arrested.

Every time someone calls me fat, I get so depressed I cut myself... a piece of cake.

Roses are red, flowers are pretty, I heard your mom has a nice pair of titties.

What is the last thing you wanna see during a prostate exam?

The doctor taking off his watch.

If you run next to a car, you get tired, but if you run behind it, you get exhausted.

I'll be here all week... sadly enough for you.

I was struggling on a math test when a girl in a wheelchair leaned over and said, "Hey, this is the easiest thing I've done all day."

I was triggered, so the next day when we were doing the pledge, I leaned over and said, "This is the easiest thing I've done all day!"

Why did the man fall into a well? He couldn’t see that well.

Teacher: Stand up if you think you are stupid.

After a while, a student stands up.

Teacher: So you think you are stupid?

Student: No, I'm not stupid. I just felt bad because you were standing by yourself.

Why are emos useful in stores? A: Their barcodes give them discounts.

Hello! I hope you're having a good day or night! Mind commenting when you laughed the hardest and why? Like if you like this post!

Q: How do you blind a woman?

A: You put a windshield in front of her.

Girl: Hey.

Orphan: Hi.

Girl: Wanna be friends?

Orphan: Sure.

Girl: Ok, and go ask your parents if we can have a sleep over.

What do a fat woman and bricks have in common? They both get laid by Mexicans.

What makes a nuke and divorce the same?

It only takes one of each to end your life.

If I told you, you had a nice body, would you hold it against me?