Aed jokes
Do you know how a dragon is? You don't know who? It's dragging these 2-liter balls across your pathetic face and slamming it into a f*cking dumpster you regret.
Sign outside a hair salon: "We'll color your hair or dye trying."
What did the girl say to the man with a moustache?
I moustache you a question.
Why did the guitarist get fired as a carpenter? He was shredding the floor...
I wrote a song about a tortilla. Well, it was more of a wrap.
What's a Latino's favorite sport? Lacrosse.
Wanna hear a plane joke? Nah, it'll just go over your head.
What's the difference between homework and a hooker? They both start with an "H", but we all know which one we would like to do.
This Fairy Tail shirt is only $9.99! Guess you can say that's a fair retail.
Stephen Hawking must have got a MacBook Pro. End of battery.
What do you call someone in a wheelchair being pushed by a cannibal?
A to-go order.
Why did the clown fall off his bike?
Because the neighbor threw a washing machine at him.
How many LGBT supporters does it take to change a lightbulb?
The lightbulb is fine the way it is. Society just needs to change the way it looks at it.
My friend's mother thought a kid who had autism and Down syndrome called him a "double down."
If this post gets 200 likes or comments, I will show up in a MrBeast video.
What starts with the letter M, ends with -arriage and is a man's favorite thing? Miscarriage. That joke never gets old, just like the baby.
What's a depressed person's favorite drink?
Depresso espresso.
Ex: baby i miss u.
Me: sorry i can't talk, i'm at a funeral.
Ex: who died?!
Me: my feelings 4 u, bitch.
An old lady walks into an adoption center, and the lady that runs the business says, "Oh, haven’t seen you in a long time!"
What's the point of hiding the screaming speed bump you ran over? You might as well hit it again to A: Stop the screaming. B: Make it look like an actual speed bump. And C... You think it's hilarious the noise it makes when you ran over its stomach.