Aed jokes
How did Teddy Roosevelt swing all the ladies?
He spoke softly and carried a big stick.
When a redhead commits a mass shooting, does the headline read, "Ginger snaps"?
When slave owners can't get a girlfriend, do they MASTERbate?
What’s long and hard and full of semen?
A submarine.
A vagina is like the weather. Once it’s wet, it’s time to go inside.
What do you call it when the Edmonton Oilers play against the Nashville Predators? A Diddy Bowl.
What did the North Tower say to the South Tower? I can’t talk right now, I gotta catch a plane.
What do you call a cold Explain bear?
A brrr.
Harder than a diamond in an ice storm.
Roses are red, violets are blue.
My heart is dead.
I’m such a fool.
Why did I fall for you?
What's the difference between a cop and a bullet?
When a bullet kills somebody, you know it's been fired.
I started a company making coffins. The slogan? 'We're dying to meet you.'
What's the difference between a joke and a tragedy? Timing.
I have a friend who's a suicide bomber. He's a blast at parties.
What's the difference between a child and a cancer diagnosis? At least the cancer grows up and leaves eventually.
Q. What do you get when you cross Vince Li with a bus? A. A whole lot of people who wished they'd missed the bus that day.
What do you call a Japanese car thief?
Tommy took a motor.
If a woman named Susan gets murdered, is it considered a Sue-icide?
What do you call a cow that wasn't meant to be born? A mi-steak!
What do you call a group of people who are interested in Nintendo monkeys?
A Kongregation.