Aed jokes
When God had to take a shit from making a good wife, you pasted between his ass cheeks...
Last night I had a dream about fishing poles, turns out it wasn't reel!
DEPRESSION SPEEDRUN starter-kit:
* Parental issues * Money problems * Genetic likeliness * Horrible friends * Annoying neighbors/classmates * School * Being alive * Actually being a good person for once * Giving a f#ck * War-ridden area * All future options kinda suck
I was listening to WAP in my car with my four-year-old cousin, and she asked why they don't fix the holes in the house.
Then my fucking boyfriend, what a hoe, was.
What did a comedian say at a show full of blind people?
"What's up?"
What's grey and can't fly? A parking lot.
I watched an episode of Law & Order Special Victims Unit. It turns out it's about rape. I thought it was going to be about crimes on a short bus or something.
The highest praise my wife gave to me was when she told me, "The best feminine attribute on your body as a woman would be your p🍆nis." 🥰
What happened to the man who turned into a pistachio?
He became a shell of who he once was.
What do you call a Lesbian at a Barbecue? A LGBBQ.
What’s the difference between bossatron5678 and a gay man?
One isn’t retarded, and one isn’t gay; the gay man is dead.
My child is ungrateful. I got him a bike for Christmas and he didn't say thank you. No, he said, "Dad, I don't have any legs!"
Did you hear about the gay Indian who died?
He was a brave sucker.
How do you kill a Hindu? PRESS THE RED BUTTON.
I was going to think of a good amputee joke...
But I’m stumped.
A hand is always sad when it sees a dick is going inside.
Person one: What did the DJ name his son?
Person two: IDK, what?
Person one: Erik (while making a DJ motion).
"Hola soy Dora, do you see Donald Trump? That’s right, he’s at my house, and he’s building a wall to separate me and Caillou. And Mami won’t let him, so she was walled alive!"
Do you know how to confuse Helen Keller?
Put her in a room and tell her to find the corner.
What do you say to a crippled man getting bullied?
"Why not you stand up for yourself?"