Aed jokes
Hey, that's the thing my grandpa has. They say that to treat it, I should call him a bitch!
Follow me.
I heard a noise, so I'm dead.
Why were the mushrooms the cool guy at the party? Because he was a fungi.
What do you call a hippo that lays eggs? A eggoppotimos.
What do a black and a tornado have in common?
They both wreck neighborhoods.
Why do you not play with a cheetah? Because they cheat!
Roses are red, violets are blue, but at least a dumptruck isn't as ugly as you.
Do you know the phrase "One man's trash is another man's treasure?"
That's a horrible thing to find out when you're adopted.
This is not a joke, Tom. I'm asking you to leave me alone, stop being sexual, I don't like you.
Your mom was dating a boy that had a twin brother, but she did it with the wrong one.
Knock Knock! Who's there? Candace Candace who? Can deez nuts fit in your mouth?
How do you cause an African parade?
You just carry a water bottle around and hold it up!
How many beans are there in Irish chili?
Answer: 239
Why are there two hundred and thirty-nine?
Answer: (spoken in Irish Brogues) Because if you add one more, it'd be "two farty."
My dad was in 9/11, that's rude, and he was a great pilot.
A TikTok I saw: "I'm in Canada, I'm in the United States!"
Most people: "I'm in South Korea, I'm in Nor- *boom*"
Me: "I'm in Palestine, I'm in Is... this heaven?"
*Insert me starting a war in the comments*
Drinking coffee when you're anxious is about as effective as using gasoline to put out a fire, but slurp slurp guess who's an anxious bitch who never learns.
You're so goddamn stupid, you thought Dunkin' Donuts was a basketball team.
The people in the tower ordered a pepperoni pizza, but all they got was a plane.
Why can't orphans be in charge of making web pages?
Because they can't add a home page.
Me before: Why do bandanas exist? They're ugly.
Me after seeing your hairline: Oh, I seeee.
Me giving pro tip: Get a bandana LMAO.