Aed jokes
I threw a dodgeball at a blind kid and got him out... guess I can say he didn't see it coming!
What do you call a Japanese person when their knees are cured?
"Happynese" (happy knees).
I once masturbated in the bathroom.
I was looking for something, for a little help.
Looked in the wardrobe and found something perfect.
I'LL NEVER SEE A TOOTHBRUSH THE SAME WAY AGAIN!
What do you call a notorious special needs student with an extra chromosome?
The double trouble.
An apple and an emo girl fall from the same height in a tree. Which one hits the ground first? The apple, cuz the noose stops her.
What do you call a teen wizard who just went through puberty?
Hairy Potter.
Q: Why can't you tell 9/11 jokes in a comedy club?
A: They always crash and burn.
Why did the emo kid not cross the road?
He was waiting for a car.
How do you get away with rape and incest in California?
Say you identify as a woman. Fact: It's actually legal to rape your daughter if you are a woman in California.
Teacher: Jeff, why did you throw a paper plane at the twins?
Jeff: You wouldn't get it, miss.
I farted in my grandma's breathing machine.
What do Nemo and Emily's dad have in common? They both can't be found.
How do you surprise a 50-year-old man? By putting a 12-inch dick through his ass.
He said, "Best surprise ever!"
Wanna hear a joke?
Look in the mirror; I'm sure you'll find one there :')
What do you say to the orphan?
"Shut up, get a mom and dad!"
I would go suck some titties, but I’d rather die from being shot than cancer.
I would make a joke about short people, but they probably couldn't hear it.
I was going to listen to a funny comment about abortion, but her joke was crap.
Yo mama was so fat that when she stepped on the scale the scale said: "You gained another pound, nice going fatso, a few more ounces and you can qualify for your own zip code!"
What do you call a Pakie with a wooden leg?
Shit on a stick.