Accident jokes
My dog was hungry, so I let him loose outside while I filled his bowl.
I found out later that he was run over by a truck. It seemed to really hit the Spot.
Why did the accountant fall off his bicycle?
Because he lost his balance!
Dang, it got ketchup on my sleeve. What do I do?
Spread the love!
Two Australians walk into a bar. They run into the ceiling fan immediately.
Why did lil Timmy drop his lollies?
He was hit by a train.
I'm Gay.
A man walks into a bar and says, "Ouch!"
Where did Alice go during the explosion?
Everywhere.
Breaking News! A plane crashes into a bridge.
What's yellow and blue and found at the bottom of a pool? A baby with slashed floaties.
How did Sally get a free trip to Hawaii? She washed up on shore.
Why did Johnny drop his pencil?
To look up girls' skirts! 😬🤯😲😳😱🙀🙊
My grandpa died in 9/11. He was a great pilot.
Plane crash in China... pilots names released in the incident are as follows:
Sum Ting Wong.
Wei Toh Low.
Ho Lee Fuk.
Ban Din Ouch.
Your Mom so fat that she went on to commit suicide, but the roof fell off.....
What's the difference between Paul Walker and a computer?
I care when my computer crashes.
How did Princess Diana die?
Giving the glove box head.
What do you call an idiot who walks on the road when cars are coming?
Fresh roadkill.
Why is my plane delayed?
Because someone hit the Sears Tower.
You know that feeling when you're going through a school parking lot and go over a speed bump, then you realize that there are no speed bumps?