Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

Autobiography

634 views ·

"I'm thinking about killing off the main character in this book I'm writing."

"What type of book is it?"

"An autobiography."

Drink

8 views ·

I got so drunk with the guys yesterday that when the Uber driver asked how many drinks I had, I said, "Yes."

Father

8 views ·

Thanks for the birthday wishes. It's been an odd one this year, as some of you know, my father suddenly passed away on my birthday last year, and anyone who knew the old man knew he had a sledgehammer wit!

Good on ya dad, ya definitely got the last laugh!

Mom

60 views ·

When I was 17, my mom’s door was always locked. I wonder what she was doing.

Salad

137 views ·

Want to know how you make any salad into a caesar salad? Stab it twenty-three times.

Democrat

2 views ·

I can’t remember if I already said this or not. I might have already said this. Also, this is a true story.

So, I’m walking into a store in Amish country, and there’s this guy with a bear trap. Then my mom’s friend says, "This guy’s gonna catch some bears." Then the Amish guy stops, looks around, and whispers, “It’s for democrats.”

Relationship

333 views ·

My uncle and I have somewhat of an awkward relationship. At times I find him a bit hard to swallow.