Worst Jokes Ever
I asked my dog this morning how her week's been going--she said "ruff." I feel her, you know? I feel her.
Why is a bee's hair so smooth and sticky?
Because they use honeycombs.
First of all, if a woman sues Bill Cosby for drugging and rape 50 years ago, and she could still remember it, it couldn't have been all bad.
The difference between George Floyd and Kobe Bryant is Kobe got air.
A TikTok I saw: "I'm in Canada, I'm in the United States!"
Most people: "I'm in South Korea, I'm in Nor- *boom*"
Me: "I'm in Palestine, I'm in Is... this heaven?"
*Insert me starting a war in the comments*
I revealed my dick to my girlfriend.
As she saw it, she said, "Nevermind, just finger me."
What is the difference between an iPhone and an orphan?
An iPhone has a button to go home.
The suicide hotline didn't even give me advice on how to kill myself. Not helpful at all.
What did Hitler and Usain Bolt have in common?
They both finished the races.
Nike isn't helpful for suicidal people. You can't tell them to "Just Do It."
Why is America bad at Clash Royale?
Because they can't defend their towers.
Why can't a homeless person be in "The Boys?"
Because he would have beef with Homelander.
Why did the hooker fall in love? Stockholm syndrome.
Teacher: "Ok class, what animal jumps the highest?"
Kid: "A leopard."
Quiet kid: "No, it's emo kids. Some of them are still in the air."
Kid: "Broooooooooooo."
My Grandpa was supposed to be in 9/11, but airport security got him.
Why did my dad cross the road?
To get to the nearest building so he wouldn't die in the crippling smoke of the most terrifying and only terrorist attack on American soil.
The orphan was playing baseball. He hit a home run. His coach told him to run home. He couldn't find it.
Hehe.
Jack and Jill went up the hill to do it in the water. Jack slipped, his condom ripped, and now they have a daughter.
Please like this. I bet my friend 20 bucks that I would get to 15 likes before him.
Abortions = yeetis of the fetus.