Worst Jokes Ever
What do an X-Box and Michael Jackson have in common? They're both made of plastic and little kids turn them on.
A pedophile pulls up to little Jonny, lowers his window and asks, "hey little boy, if I give you a lolly, will you come in my car?" Little Jonny replies, "Give me the whole packet and I’ll come in your mouth."
Why can’t Michael Jackson win a race?
Because he’s always coming in a lil’ behind.
Orphans: Sad, Depressed, Lonely, Virgin.
Why did Michael Jackson go to jail? He was feeling a little Randy.
brb makin' tic tac toe boards on myself.
A shark can swim faster than me, but I can run faster than a shark.
So in a triathlon, it would all come down to whoever can ride a bike the fastest.
What is stronger than family?
The tree Paul Walker hit.
How can you make a woman scream your name when you have sex with her?
Change your name to "Rape."
Did you hear about the bisexual from Alabama? He can't decide whether to fuck his brother or his sister.
One day I threw a boomerang...
Now I live in constant fear.
What do you call an autistic person with a driver's license?
A LETHAL WEAPON!
What’s the difference between a suicide bomber and a feminist? A suicide bomber actually does something when triggered.
I have no problem getting dates online. I’ve also had luck with almonds, cashews, and walnuts.
Why shouldn't you let a Chinese person play baseball?
'Cause they'll eat the bat!
Are you a school? Because I want to shoot a bunch of kids in you.
What do lesbians and turtles have in common? They both choke on plastic.
I got detention yesterday because I told the emo kid to "Hang in there."
What's the difference between family and cats...
Cats won't abuse you at Christmas.
Baka!