12 jokes
My mum touched my friend, but she wasn’t the she’s only 12.
On the 12th day of Christmas Peo Pessi gave to me:
12 tap ins
11 pointless dribbles
10 fixed league titles
9 missed penalties
8-2
6 dives
500 million robbed from Barca
4 UCL semi losses
3 times he blamed Higuain
2 retirements
And a transfer to a farmers league.
What’s the difference between a cow and Hitler jokes?
You can’t milk the cow after 12 years.
Why did I buy the orphan an iPhone 12? Because he couldn't get home.
If there are 12 fish and 6 drown, how many are left?
12, because fish don't drown.
The cop that is on a 12 o'clock shift says, "Hands up!"
Easy way to get away from rape is to become the rapist. All women need to carry a 12-inch dildo and a gun!
A guy gets home from work to see his girlfriend packing, and he asks her why she is packing. The girl says, "Because I found out you're a pedophile." The guy goes, "A pedophile?" And she says, "Yes." The guy goes, "That's a big word for a 12-year-old."
A mathematics professor arrived home at 3 am drunk.
His wife was up waiting for him.
"You said you'd be home by 11:45!" she yelled.
He responded, "No my dear, I said I'd be home at a quarter of 12."
Yo mama's so stupid, she stared at a cup of orange juice for 12 hours because it said "concentrate."
What is an orphan's first phone?
An iPhone 12. Wanna know why?
It has no home button :D
One day I told a kid what 2 x 12 was. He said he didn't know. I said let's go to my basement and figure it out. He is still in my basement trying to do the equation.
What did the Indians say to the Arabs? "We are going to make 10/12!"
I hate school. I mean, why can't you pull out a 12 gauge and shoot everyone, including the teachers?! This generation is too soft, man.
Why can’t a nose be 12 feet long?
Because then, it would be a foot.
Why can't 12 boys go down the elevator? Because they have nothing to press the buttons.
DB: I'm the only shotgun with more than 1 barrel!
Lancaster: Are you sure about that?
DB: huh?
Lancaster: I have 4 barrels!
DB: WHAT!?
Penta Barrel: I got 5!
DB: *insert becoming uncanny*
Dual Hexagon shotgun: I got 12!
The others: HOW!?
*and that's how an argument started.*
Best pick up line EVER.
There is an app on your phone called ringer. Go into it. There is a 12 to 15 digit number. Enter that into my phone, my dick will get 12 to 15 inches longer.
STORY OF 2 PEOPLE NOT ME:
Girlfriend: What would you do if I won the lottery?
Boyfriend: I would take half and leave you.
Girlfriend: Ok cool. I won 12 dollars here's 6 and don't come back.
Imagine me being 12 feet taller than your dad.