Worst Jokes Ever
What's the difference between sand and a dildo? Sand has never gone up my ass.
I want to die like my grandpa, with a blindfold and a wet sponge on his head.
What is the best thing about being buried alive or burning to death?
No funeral costs.
Jokes suck.
What do you call a homeless bounty hunter?
Hobo Fett!
Jimmylikeskids4
Sometimes you just need to take a drive through the city to clear your head.
-JFK
What do you call a lesbian? Me.
Sniff a liter of petrol. You'll go back to the dream time at.
What did the downs kid get on his math test??
Drool.
I named my dog 5-Miles, so now I tell people, "I walk 5-Miles every day."
Why are orphans bad at poker?
They don't know what a full house is.
Sixty years ago, Stephen Hawking's teacher got fired for accidentally making an offensive joke. What was it? Go for your dreams, kids. Reach for the stars.
What do you call nuts on your chest? Chestnuts.
What do you call nuts on the wall? Walnuts.
What do you call nuts on your chin? A blowjob.
What do you do when your dishwasher breaks down?
You punch her in the face and remind her of her duties.
This Chinese girl didn't know what a sausage roll was, so I replied, "It's like a spring roll with sausage in it, but not any dog or cat how you have it."
What type of flour do you buy an orphan? Self-raising.
Pep called; they want their unpadded bra back.
There is an upside to being an orphan. Every bag of chips is family size.
My cousin died last week. He needed a blood transfusion, but we didn't know his blood type. He just kept saying, "B positive, B positive," but it's hard to be positive with him gone.