You're jokes
Why is the last part of orphanage "age?"
Because it doesn't matter your age.
Your hairline is so far gone that you could build a runway.
Your hairline is like Mr. Clean's... nonexistent!
Sister: You're so stupid.
Me: Calling me stupid doesn't make you any smarter!
A young orphan boy goes to school for the first time. A bigger boy comes and punches him. He says, "What are you gonna do, cry to your mommy?" The boy cries.
Next morning, he wakes up and comes to school. The same thing happens, but the older boy brings his friends. This time, after he says, "You gonna tell your mom?", the little boy says, "Yes, I will tell them that there is company coming over."
The spotify time bar thing is a light saber when listening to star wars soundtracks
Your mama's so fat, she runs a trade deficit with food!
Jeffy: "Daddy, Daddy, a monster said it’s gonna poop in your hat!"
Marvin: "I don’t believe that."
Jeffy: "But he said, 'Jeffy, I’m gonna poop in your Daddy’s hat!'"
The next morning,
Jeffy: "Daddy, a monster pooped in your hat!"
*Marvin/Mario looks in his hat*
Marvin: "Jeffy, I don’t believe you, you pooped in my hat!"
A robot walks into a bar and orders a martini.
The bartender is flabbergasted that a robot can do that.
"New around here?" said the bartender.
"Nah, been here a while," said the robot.
Bartender "You can talk?"
Robot "Yeah, pretty cool, huh."
Bartender "Why do you want a martini?"
Robot "Oh, I'm just in the mood for one, you know?"
The bartender is shocked to see a robot making completely normal small talk.
The robot seems to be just like a normal human.
"Wow, who programmed you?" asked the bartender.
"The top minds in the world," said the robot.
The robot speaks again, "I have a question for you..."
Bartender, "What?"
"Why did you read this entire story? It does not have a punchline. I just wasted your time. Get bamboozled, nerd!"
Do you know your E?
You're E tarded.
Incest.
When your genealogy chart is a straight line.
Your forehead is so big it drips pickle juice!
What's the difference between your new girlfriend and a tornado? At first, there is a lot of blowing, and then your house will be gone.
Your mum is so fat, when I see her, I get depressed.
So, there's a black guy, a white guy, and a Mexican. They find a genie's lamp, they rub it, and poof! Appears the genie!
The genie goes to the black guy and asks, "What's your one wish?" The black guy goes, "I wish for me and all my people to be back in Africa, happy and everything." So poof! His wish is granted.
Then, the genie goes to the Mexican and asks, "What's your one wish?" The Mexican goes, "I wish for me and all my people to be in Mexico, happy and everything." So poof! His wish is granted.
Now, the genie goes over to the white guy and asks, "What's your one wish?" and the white guy asks, "You mean to tell me that all the black and Mexican people are out of America?" The genie replies, "Yes."
The white guy goes, "Then I'll have a Coke."
"Squid Game" doll be like: "Gugu la gu, your mom, my balls!"
You're so ugly your mom and dad abandoned you, and you went to the adoption center, and not even the adoption center would take you or let you in.
They say you should love your neighbor. Does that mean I have to love the president?
Aiden's the best, in any contest, and no matter what, he'll kick your butt!
When should you discourage your husband from exercising and dieting? When he wants to fit in your clothes!
I see a kid crying in the park, right? So I go up to him and say, "Hey, where are your parents?" and he says, "Well, my dad left to get the milk and never came back, and my mother died in a plane crash in the Bermuda Triangle."