You're jokes
A friend sits across from me at class so I asked if she wants to hang out sometimes. She said yes, so I called her over to my house, and that's the day I found out she was a guy.
The moral of the story: don't try to fuck your friends.
Can I put my balls in your jaw <3?
It looks like your dad is not the only one missing.
If this pops up on your timeline, fuck you!
You know you're fucked when the speed bump screams.
This is not a joke. Have you ever thought about it? You’re an emo while wearing black. So what if you are black? Does that mean you’re an emo because you are black and emos wear black? ;)
Ex-bf's gf: You're so ugly as hell.
Me: Oh, did I mention that I was trying to be you?
What did the magician do as a trick in his show?
Make your doubts about magic... DISAPPEAR!
*walks into a comedy night club* Owner: "You're doing standup tonight, right?" Noob Joker (you): "Yes, I am!" Owner: "Get onto the stage." Me: *walks up stage* Owner: "This is the standup comedian noobpro." Me: "Hey guys, how about some Donald Trump?" Crowd: *RUNS*
You're so skinny the world turns to the left!
"You’re the milk to my cookies."
Why do orphans like Darth Vader?
So he can say, "I'm your father!"
A man was on the street and went up to a kid wearing rags. The man asked, "Hey, are you an orphan?"
The kid said, "Yeah, what gave me away?"
The man said, "Your parents."
Gimme a nickel or I'll tickle your pickle!
What would you do after seeing your most loved one shot? Reload.
Will Smith slapped your hairline to space.
Your balls are so big, when people see you at the market, they think it's watermelon.
When you're watching a 9/11 documentary, that one kid in your class finds the 97th Jenga block and knocks it down.
Hey, my sister said you're Mattick, so I decided to swim with her and she threw a ball at me, so I went to my dad and she said, "Why did you tell dad?" She was crying because I’m not getting a car seat.
What does your dad's cock and Darryl's Savouries have in common?
I want them both in my mouth!