You jokes
"Hey, you! Why are you so serious?"
Yo mama so hairy, you almost died from a rug burn!
If your sis makes you mad, so go to your friend's home to play.
If your sis is sad, go tell Mom.
Q: I'm a famous athlete and I've got a lot of fans.
A: Is that why I never see you sweat?
What do you call a German that is blind? A not-see.
Life is like a game of poker, guys start by going with them clubs, ladies follow with a set of hearts, guys put down the diamonds, and before you know it you got a full house.
You know Thomas Paine, right? Well, clearly he had some common sense too, right?
Let me just remove my finger from your bottom.
Thank you, nurse!
If you think about it, then adoption is the last choice for getting a child, so those who are adopted were the last choice.
They say Disneyland is the happiest place on earth. Well, apparently, no one has ever been standing next to you.
What did the tiger say to the bunny?
Nice to meat you!
What do you call a guy at your doorstep with no arms and no legs?
Matt!
If you wanna get fat, what's the quickest way to do it?
Eat two jars of mayo each day, and in about a month, your scale will have your phone number!
You look like a sandwich Bigfoot didn't even like.
You know that you f**k better than dad?
I know, mom says that too. (Typical Alabama Family)
"Give me 5 cents and I’ll grant you a wish."
Ok.
"Thank you, what is your wish?"
I wish for my 5 cents back.
You're so ugly!
You don't have a forehead, you have a fivehead.
You don't have dreams, you have movies.
Looking for true love. Must be into fun, likes to go out driving, playing the latest catching game and most importantly, must love kids. (PEADOPHILES MUST APPLY WITH HOW MANY KIDS YOU CAN CARRY!)
What do you call a group of depressed kids?
A suicide squad.