You jokes
What do you get when you cross a deer and a pickle?
A dildo.
Do you like Mirah?
Mirah-t nuts.
Leo: Mother, what is an idiot?
Mother: An idiot is someone that explains something in a long, boring way so that the person that the idiot is trying to explain to doesn't understand.
Mother: Do you understand?
Leo: No.
Russia and Ukraine are running a marathon. Who do you think won? Russia did. Russia gave Ukraine a migraine.
If you're pro-life, I hope you get hit by a bus today!
Why does cancer kill you? Because it does. 🌝
Scratches on an icy road and kills 50 people on the bus, and when they get to Heaven, God feels so bad for them and grants them all one wish.
The first lady in the line was always worried about her looks, so she wished to be beautiful, and the guy behind her couldn’t think of what to wish about, so he also wished to be beautiful. This kept on going, but the guy at the end of the line started to laugh. When he got to God, God says, “What is your one wish, my son?” He said, “I wish you can make them all ugly again.”
Nobody knows how bad you smell.
When Stephen Hawking's teacher asked him, "What do you want to be when you grow up?"
He said, "Six foot four."
What do you call an orphan family photo?
A selfie.
What do you call a priest in a room full of naked boys?
A colonoscopy.
What do you call a rapper who's ALWAYS on time?
Punctual P
You're so ugly, when your mom dropped you off at school, she got a fine for littering.
Confucius say: Never try win head-butting contest with mongoloid. You lose every time, and you only hurt yourself.
Unless he use Mongolian recurved bow... then you in trouble!
Jesus got rejected. A few years later he died. He came back just to lose his virginity because even Jesus is not a fucking cunt.
Get off this site and go have some sex, you fucking virgins.
What do you call one orphan taking a photo?
A family photo.
You're so skinny, you probably wipe your ass with floss.
You get a deep voice, you shit talk to 5 year olds.
Today, my mom gave me a lecture on how to stay safe during school shootings. When my brother walked past, my mom asked me a question: "What do you think of going through kids' heads during a school shooting?" That's when my brother came back downstairs and said to me and my mom, "Bullets." We don't talk about this anymore.
What do you give a sick lemon?
A lemon-aid.