You're so skinny that if I were to put you on a flagpole, you would wave in the wind.
You Jokes
Have you heard anything about this Chuck Norris guy? Yeh, me neither.
After seeing you sing, the dog got disinfected from rabies.
You call me a prostitute's son, I call you test-tube babies.
You're so small that when you go to the doctor, he doesn’t know you're there.
What do you call a AK-47 that lost 1 point?
An AK-46.
Did you know the "w" in Africa stands for water?
What do you call a Chinese hooker that won't get on her knees?
Cantonese...
Girlfriend: You remind me of a cell phone.
Girlfriend's ex: Why?
Girlfriend: Because you're about to die.
Tell an emo, "Do you get jealous when your phone dies?"
Doctor: “I have good and bad news.”
Patient: “Give me the good news first.”
Doctor: “Your test results are back and you have only two days to live.”
Patient: “That’s the good news? What’s the bad news?”
Doctor: “I’ve been trying to reach you for two days.”
Friend: Your t-shirt is cringe.
Me: You should go get the Covid test because one of their symptoms is no taste.
"Did it hurt when you fell from Heaven? You're adopted. Haley says she likes me more than you."
Talking about planets with my nephew.
He asked if you could plow thru Uranus because it's all gas.
*text conversation boy: When you kiss someone, you burn 15 calories. Wanna burn calories together sometime?
girl: Are you saying I'm fat?
You get hit by a wave, but you don't get wet. Why?
You were hit by a shockwave!
What do you say when a cat says "me moaw"?
The cat says "me toooo!"
Why was Liverpool better than Man United? We won 5-0, and you have a sex offender on your team.
I would like to call you as dumb as a rock, but they can hold a door open.
Q: What do you call a duck that's sad?
A: Idk, but it's acting really duckpressed.
Yo mama so dumb, she thought "The Squid Game" was an all-you-can-eat buffet.
