You jokes
What's the difference between a blonde and your computer?
You don't want your computer to go down on you.
How do you know that your sister is on her period?
Your dad's dick tastes weird.
The dick said to the ass, "this place is a shit hole."
The ass replied, "Yes, but you still keep coming."
Little Johnny was sitting in class one day, and the teacher was talking about life. The teacher asked him, "Little Johnny, how do you want your wife to be like?" Little Johnny answered, "Like the moon." The teacher said, "That's such a beautiful answer because it's calm and peaceful." Little Johnny replied, "No, because it appears at night and disappears in the morning."
Me: How do you celebrate Christmas?
Orphan: I don't know what you mean.
Me: There is no one to give a present.
Whenever you wanna roast an orphan, say "yo mamma".
What did the rapper say to his shoes?
"You better lace up!"
Kid 1: Words can't describe how ugly you are.
Kid 2: Words can describe how beautiful you are.
Kid 1: Aw, thanks!
Kid 2: But numbers can. 0/10
Q: Do you know why orphans rob banks?
A: Because it's a guarantee they'll be wanted afterwards.
I respect cancer more than I respect depression.
At least cancer has the balls to kill you himself.
When you have an ex, you will notice that the word "ex" is short for "executed," so that's there for yous.
My mum told me to take you to the zoo and throw you in the lake, but I couldn't find you.
In the morning at 6:30 AM,
Teacher: Who fought in World War I?
Me: Trump & Biden.
Teacher: Oh ok... well good job class, see you tomorrow and study your books.
After school,
Teacher: Oh God those kids know nothing.
"She looks at her clock."
Teacher: And now I am sewed.
Why does everyone get offended at female firefighters?
Like seriously, if your house is on fire and burning, you wouldn't really care if the person saving you had a low IQ, right?
I saw three people online on this site... Hope you guys will commit suicide tonight.
How do you get a baby in a box? With a blender.
Are you in the alphabet 'cause I wanna give you the D.
Would you watch a tree grow? Or a knee grow?
What do you call a sad porno?
A tear jerker.
Obama, Trump, and Clinton are on the Titanic. The ship hits the iceberg and is going down.
Obama: "This is terrible! We've got to do something -- save the women and children!"
Trump: "Screw the women and children!"
Clinton: "Do you think we have time...?"