You jokes
What do you call an emo's face?
Elmo's son.
Mommy, Mommy, are you an archer?
"Shut up and keep the apple on your head still."
You lost 30 lbs when you joined Weight Watchers, and lost another 10 lbs when they shaved your back.
Grandma isn’t responding. Close app, wait, cancel.
Which do you choose?
If you look up the word "wheelchair" in a dictionary, you will see a picture of Stephen Hawking.
Knock knock.
You: Who's there?
Urmom.
Me and my friend roasting each other.
Him: Your dad dropped you on purpose, but my dad dropped me by accident.
Me: But after dropping you, he never picked you up.
Do you know why boys can't ask girls out? Because they don't have any balls to ask girls out!
What do you call a deer that has no eyes?
No eye deer.
Beans for centuries have been called "false friends," because they have a tendency to talk behind one's back. If you get my drift. 🤣
What do you call a deaf person?
Whatever you want!
It's kinda sad seeing you attempt to put your whole vocabulary in one sentence. Oh wait, you only said three words.
What do you call a man with no body and no nose?
Nobody knows.
What did the toaster say to the slice of bread? "I want you inside me."
What do you call a scared cow?
A COW-ard.
Some guy asked me, "Are you better than my meat?" I said, "No, I'm not better, I just beat it all the time."
What do you call a deaf dog? As you like, he doesn't hear you anyway.
Jim was caught beating a man up. Brooklyn took a picture of his license plate with her phone and told him, "Your life is ruined!" So Jim took a picture of her, and the next thing you know, he said, "Now my phone is ruined!"
Why is basketball called basketball?
Because you play with a basket.
I'll never forget my grampa's last words, "Stop shaking the ladder, you cunt!"