You jokes

I dare you to smile like a donut. Did you do it?

Q: What do you call a Chinese Billionaire?

A: Cha-ching!

At one point in your life, you were exactly pi years old.

Why can't you be gay and in a wheelchair?

Because you can't be a fruit and a vegetable at the same time.

How do you make your girlfriend scream during sex?

Call and tell her about it.

What do you call a donkey and a potato?

Assround

What do you call a terrorist at a cinema?

A box office bomb.

What do you call a nut that screws and then bolts?

An escapee from a mental hospital.

My gf/bf said: "I'm dating your uncle!" You cry and you look under your bed and your uncle says: "Damn."

"I work with animals," a guy says to his date.

"That's so sweet," she replies. "I love a man who cares about animals. Where do you work?"

"I'm a butcher," he replies.

You look too old to be living with your grandma.

What do you call a girl with no legs?

Unshakeable.

Magician: "I am the greatest magician in the whole world. Look, now you see the rabbit in the hat, and now it is gone!"

Redneck girl: "That's nothing. My dad is the greatest magician! He disappears for a whole year and reappears at Christmas for a couple of hours!"

Tyler is ugly.

If you are called Tyler, change your name.

Your hair is receding more than people do when they smell you.

Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke some marijuana.

Jack got high and slapped his thigh and said, "You know you wanna."

Jill said yes, picked up her dress and said, "Let's have some fun!"

Silly ole Jill forgot her pill, and now they have a son.

Orphan: I'm hungry.

Dad: Let's go to KFC.

Orphan 2: Boy, you don't got a dad!

What do you call a man without a body and a nose?

What do you call Mordecai dressing up as a basketball player?

Blue Jay Simpson!

When life gives you lemons... call them yellow oranges and sell 'em for double the price!