You jokes

What do you call a dwarf skating on ice?

A midget spinner.

What do you call a three humped camel?

*at school*

Nobody: Do you want nuts?

Me: Wait, you have some?

Nobody: Yeah, they're my own.

Me: :0

You're so fat, when you step on a scale it says, "To be continued."

What do you call a stoned Mexican?

Baked bean.

They say during sex you burn off as many calories as running 8 miles. Who the fuck runs 8 miles in 30 seconds?

Your friend lost his left arm, and after getting out of the hospital, you ask him if he’s OK. He says, "Yeah, I’m all RIGHT."

What do you get when you mix a 737 and 767?

A 797.

You know how there were like... two towers. I had so much fun playing Jenga in those planes! I WON!!!!!

ATTENTION EVERYBODY: I am the owner of this website, and I will be deleting it in 5 hours. Thank you everybody who has participated in this website's life. Goodbye!

What do you call a cow with no legs?

Ground meat.

I'll never forget my aunt's last words before she died: "Can you stop shaking the ladder, please?"

How do you make a peanut laugh? You crack it up!

How do you try to shout at someone on the bottom of the ground?

"Hey, sir! Are you dead?"

What do you call the Gray Man in an electric chair? Fried Fish.

What do you call a lesbian Dinosaur?

Lickalotapuss.

What's the difference between a bison and a buffalo?

You can't wash your face in a buffalo.

I rang my boss and said, "I’m really sick. I won’t be coming into work." My boss said, "Davo, you're sick again! Really! Just how sick are you now?" I replied, "Well, I’m in bed with my sister!"

What do you call it when an orphan takes a picture?

A family portrait.

One day I met a blind guy and I said, "You should see Mt. Cheaha!"