Marathon

Marathon Jokes

Foot

What's got 5 arms, 3 legs, and 2 feet? The finish line at the Boston Marathon.

What did the boy with no hands get for Christmas? Gloves! Nah, just kidding... He still hasn't unwrapped his present.

Blast

Did you hear about the Boston marathon? 'Cause, well, I heard it was a blast and that it blew everyone away!

Vegan

How do you know if someone is a vegan or has run a marathon?

They'll tell you.

Africa

How do you get 1 million followers:

{ RUN THROUGH AFRICA WITH A BOTTLE OF WATER }

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  • Fitness

    My fitness guru said that if I got raped, it would help me in future marathons.

    Sex

    They say during sex you burn off as many calories as running 8 miles. Who the fuck runs 8 miles in 30 seconds?

    Runner

    I was watching the London Marathon one year, and I saw two runners in costumes. One of them was dressed a chicken and the other dressed as an egg. I thought: "This'll be interesting."

    Hairline

    This year the London marathon was run on your hairline. It was so far back no one could complete it!

    Russia

    Russia and Ukraine are running a marathon. Who do you think won? Russia did. Russia gave Ukraine a migraine.

    Memes