Marathon jokes
Did you hear about the Boston marathon? 'Cause, well, I heard it was a blast and that it blew everyone away!
How do you know if someone is a vegan or has run a marathon?
They'll tell you.
What's got 5 arms, 3 legs, and 2 feet? The finish line at the Boston Marathon.
What did the boy with no hands get for Christmas? Gloves! Nah, just kidding... He still hasn't unwrapped his present.
What's long, hard, and bloody?
The Boston Marathon.
I was watching the London Marathon one year, and I saw two runners in costumes. One of them was dressed a chicken and the other dressed as an egg. I thought: "This'll be interesting."
Once, there was a brother and a sister that shared a YouTube channel. He named it "Penis Dick Marathon."
What has 5 arms, 3 legs, and 2 feet? The finish line at the Boston Marathon.
Russia and Ukraine are running a marathon. Who do you think won? Russia did. Russia gave Ukraine a migraine.
They say during sex you burn off as many calories as running 8 miles. Who the fuck runs 8 miles in 30 seconds?
My fitness guru said that if I got raped, it would help me in future marathons.
How do you get 1 million followers:
{ RUN THROUGH AFRICA WITH A BOTTLE OF WATER }
3 boys were having a debate about who had the healthiest grandma.
Boy 1: "I have the healthiest grandma. She is 67 years old and can still do a backflip!"
Boy 2: "No, I have the healthiest grandma. She is 76 years old and can still finish a marathon!"
Boy 3: "I have the healthiest grandma. She is 85 and she is in the hospital..."
Boy 1 and 2, looking confused.
Boy 1: "If she's so healthy, why is she in the hospital?"
Boy 3: "Because she's giving birth right now!"
This year the London marathon was run on your hairline. It was so far back no one could complete it!
Who were the fastest runners ever? Adam and Eve. They were first in the human race.
What runs but never stops?
NASA found water on Mars.
Mars - 1
Africa - 0
Astronauts just found water on Mars! Mars: 1. Africa: 0.
Water was found on Mars.
Mars: 1 Africa: 0
According to scientists, there has been a discovery of water on Mars.
Mars-1
Africa-0
Community talk
Just watched almost all of the Friday the 13ths and Jason blah blah blah. HEAR MEOUT. LIKE.. LISTEN HE IS JUST.. AHHHHHHHHHH
Sixty-four people playing games and talking Black Hole threatens all of them 'Til a blue hand stops them Their name is Four, with X in tow Can they trust them? I don't know! They said, Don't you wanna battle for a prize? You could win a BFDI Eight teams of eight are made Get a basket and you'll be safe
Elimination time, it's Cake at Stake Pencil's out and taken away Where'd she go? Their jaws are slack Four brings d… Read more
Yall ima do a harry potter marathon becuase my dad knows NOTHING so it'll take a few days