You jokes

There are times I miss you, that I wish I could remember where I hid your body.

What do you call a dinosaur with a cowboy hat and cowboy boots?

A Tyrannosaurus Tex.

Can [I] ask your sister how you are going for Christmas? And [to clarify,] I have internet.

One time there was a depressed man standing in the middle of a train track. A girl said, "Excuse me, can you move, please? I'm trying-" Then the man stopped her sentence and said, "How is your t-shirt so clean?" Then she said back, "Easy, hung it up."

Old woman: You are such a darling child. Please come and see me again next year.

A year later, as child walks up to the door of the old lady's house...

Old woman: Oh my! Goodness sakes, child! Have you grown, or have I shrank???

Child: Both.

Ariana Grande was in the store, and when she put her groceries on the counter, she said, "Thank you, next!"

What do you tell twins that are in love with each other?

Go fuck yourselves!

Have you ever had a friend who masturbated many times? I had one who did a lot, but he had no imagination... when he masturbated, he imagines his hand.

Why are women like KFC? After you finish with the thigh and the breasts, all you have left is the greasy box to put your bone in.

When she saw her first strands of grey hair, she thought she'd dye.

So, she went to see the "You Should Be Shot" Photography Studio.

Hey, you person who's scrolling, please leave your HONEST opinion on life. Do you think "life sucks" or "eh, it's okay," etc.? It can be short; if you don't want to, then that's okay.

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Ken.

Ken who?

Can you walk the dog for me?

Knock knock.

Who's there? Discord server.

Discord server who?

This server is dead, bye bitches, I got better things to do than watch you sit here and type like a sloth.

My mom told me, "You son of a b!tch." I told her, "I may be a son of a b!ch but at least I am not the bitch." She hated me forever.

Denki: Hey, Mineta, I have a joke for you.

Mineta: Go on.

Denki: Uraraka's booty.

Mineta: I don't get it.

Denki: Exactly.

Mineta: ^cries T_T^

How do you make an apple turnover?

You push it down a hill.

What do you say when a person trips?

You say, "Why you trippin'?"

What did the orange say to the other orange?

I orange you glad!

If you read this, you lost your v card.

They say making and having friends comes with some benefits. I guess you could say I have friends with benefits.