You jokes
Hi, I love you. You know I do. What a good night of a good time and time to go, oooo!
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Atch.
Atch who?
Sorry you are sneezing. Have you got a cold?
My Wife: How much do you love me??
Me: Count all the stars.
My Wife: Aww, infinity.
Me: No, a waste of time.
My family is like treasure; you need a map and a shovel to find them.
What do you call German weed?
Mustard Gas.
What do you call a committee of emo kids?
A cutting board!
When you were born, you were so ugly that the doctors slapped your parents!
What do you call an orphan’s picture?
A family photo.
You look so pretty. Not at all gross today.
What do you call an orphan's family picture? A self-portrait.
What do you say to a 1 legged hitch hiker?
Hop in!
What do you call a short person that goes to school?
A Sammie.
I wanna tell you guys a joke about a broken pencil...
But it’s quite pointless.
What do you call a person with 2 black eyes?
Nothing, you told them twice.
GF: What do you think of our love?
BF: Count the stars in the sky.
GF: Aww... It's infinity!
BF: Nope. It's just a waste of time.
What do you call a Chinese boy throwing poo?
Yung Flung Dung.
If you play the movie "Jaws" in reverse, it's a heartwarming story about a shark who gives arms and legs to disabled people.
Are you a highway? Because I wanna lay on you.
How do you know when it's bedtime in the Netherlands?
When the big hand touches the little hand.
Why can't you play memory snap in the jungle?
Because there are too many cheetahs.