You jokes
Bully: I'm going to hurt you so bad.
You: Well, your IQ is the same amount of teeth I'm about to knock out, so... you're so dumb that you don't even know how to do that.
And your IQ is 5.
Roses are red, Violets are blue, God made me pretty, WHAT THE FRICK HAPPENED TO YOU?
Soldiers, there is one thing you can be sure of: You will be at home with your families, in a jar on the mantelpiece.
Have you ever had a friend who masturbated many times? I had one who did a lot, but he had no imagination... when he masturbated, he imagines his hand.
Can [I] ask your sister how you are going for Christmas? And [to clarify,] I have internet.
Title
How do you find out about the accomplishments of the former president of the United States James Earl Carter?
Read the label on the jar of Skippy peanut butter.
You must have a good power supply, because you're easy to turn on!
Did you hear about the guy that went to a nudist colony? The first day was his hardest.
🎨🧑🏻🦰 day was that good fun day at home 🏠. I had to the earth and I love it when you get a home and walk walk home from school and walk home and walk walk home from school and walk walk home 🏠. Was your birthday 🎁? I did.
How can you tell a bow n' arrows scared?
He starts to quiver! ;)
What do you call a devil texting you? Travelers on the way. 😈🤣
Fence 1 was thinking and Fence 2 said, "Are you still on the fence about running away?"
Fence 1 said, "Yeah, I was thinking of running on the RAILROAD."
Think about you are so fucking high that you are walking to a lift and inside the lift are stairs. 🤣🤣🤣🤣
You're so trash that when I dropped you off, I got a ticket for littering.
When you donate a kidney, you are a total hero, everyone loves you.
When you donate five kidneys though, people start yelling, the police gets called--sheesh!
Did you hear about the actor who fell through the floorboard?
Don't worry, he was just going through a stage.
Why can't you hear the Pterodactyl go to the bathroom?
Because its pee is silent.
Teacher: Great! You’re studying in break time!
Student: Thank you. I heard that it is good to study before sleep.
You were born on the highway. That's where most accidents happen.
They say making and having friends comes with some benefits. I guess you could say I have friends with benefits.