You jokes
If you are ever bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
you.
Q: How can you tell that a pedophile likes music?
A: He rapes D minor.
Doctor: What makes you feel depressed?
Me: I used to work at the World Trade Center, before the plane hit.
Doctor: A lot of people fell to pieces after that.
When you accidentally wipe a little too hard and your finger goes up your bumhole, triggering flashbacks of when you were 10 and your uncle stayed a few weeks. 😂
Memes
Never attempt to foreshadow your own death, you may end up regretting it. You can chop me up and throw me in the fridge if I’m wrong.
A good dog name is Syndrome. That way when it tries attacking, you can yell, "Down, Syndrome!"
What do you do if your girlfriend starts smoking?
Stop and apply lubrication.
Why shouldn’t you play basketball with a pig?
Because he’s a ball hog.
Old man goes to the doctor.
The doctor says, "The test results are back, and I'm sad to say you have cancer and Alzheimer's."
The old man says, "Phew! At least it's not cancer!"
What did the cake say to the fork?
"Do you want a piece of me!!!"
Have you heard about the guy whose friends teased him because he pays for sex? He doesn't pay anymore.
What do you call a gay man that is not physically handicapped that performs blowjobs on gay men that are physically handicapped?
Caregiver.
What would you find on a haunted beach?
A sand-witch!
"Hey guys, I'm a new jokester, remember my name as I'll be making a lot more!!! P.S. They will be much better than this one!"
What do you think is going through kids' heads during school shootings? Bullets.
Have you heard about the pedophile who was found guilty of robbery?
- He robbed children of their innocence.
Teacher: What does a pig give you?
Little Johnny: Bacon.
Teacher: Good, what does the sheep give you?
Little Johnny: Wool.
Teacher: What does the fat cow give you?
Little Johnny: Homework and says "leave motherf*cker".
How do you make rape funny? Tickle her while you do it.
What do you call a woman who says she can do anything a man can do?
Wrong.
How do you know when a football player has been to jail?
When he goes in a tight end and comes out a wide receiver.