You jokes
I would roast you, but the mirrors do when you look at them.
So the teacher goes up to you and says, "I'm going to call your parents." Me: "Good luck finding them."
He is looking for children. If you don't know who EDP445 is, look him up.
Be careful around EDP445.
An apple a day keeps the doctor away...
Or at least it does if you throw it hard enough.... đ„”đ€Ł
Smile, because it confuses people. Smile, because itâs easier than explaining what is killing you inside.
When you push your grandma out of her wheelchair and steal it.
âThey see me rollinâ, they hatinâ.â
Blue: The ocean is a place where the creatures live.
Black: NIGHTMARES LIVE!
Blue: It has many pretty things and it will-
Black: KILL YA TO DEATH! Especially if you are on Titanic! So let that sink in. PUN INTENDED!
What do you call a suicide bomber under the water?
Answer: A bath bomb.
When you feel lonely, just watch a scary movie.
You won't feel lonely anymore :(
what do you call an orphan taking a selfie?
a family photo.
Mom: Are you seriously gonna die?
Me: No. Don't worry. Suicide is the last thing I'll do.
You're so ugly that everytime you look up in the sky, God says, "Sorry, can't help you."
Teacher: Where were you born?
Student: The highway.
Teacher: What do you mean?
Student: I don't know, my mom says that's where all the accidents happen.
The gayest person on Earth is Pac-Man.
You can pay him 50 cents to eat 200 balls.
Kid: Mum, how do you know someone is drunk?
Mum: See the four birds over there?
Kid: Huh, wait a minute.
Mum: A drunk person would see eight.
Kid: Mum, but there is only two.
Be careful what you say around Indians, the red dot means they're recording.
How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? Are you kidding? Feminists canât change anything.
What do you call a nosy pepper?
Jalapeno.
Did you hear the joke about the butter?
What is it?
I canât tell you, youâll spread it.
What do KFC and pussy have in common?
Both are finger lickin' good, and after you are done eating, you have a box to put the bone in.