You jokes
Little off topic but...
Mum: You wouldn't be here without me.
Son: And my birth certificate is a sorry letter from the condom factory.
Mum: Fair point.
What do you call 3 orphan girls in a tornado?
All of her twist.
You look easy to draw.
What do you call a Panera Bread you write with?
Panera lead.
When you have erectile dysfunction, it could be expressed as the Leaning Tower of Pisa.
Memes
If you got a bowling ball and you stuck it on top of a sack of potatoes, what would you get?
A "retiree."
"It's not a war crime if you invade a country with oil."
-Sun Tzu, Art of War
You're so skinny that you fall.
What do you say if you want to borrow your black sister's foundation? "Got any lighter shades?"
What do you call a sad rabbit? Unhoppy.
Why isn't there a sad sunglasses emoji? To show that I am happy but I'm still cool.
Waitress: What can I get for you?
Me: I'll have a steak.
Waitress: How would you like it?
Me: Immediately!
You can tell if a woman is angry if she is holding a gun.
Knock knock. Who's there? Well, I will tell you who's not there: my dad.
Do you like In-N-Out?
Yes, why? In and out of your mouth.
"You can drink drinks, but you can't food foods."
-Sun Tzu, The Art Of Food
"You cannot win a war without a war."
-Sun Tzu, *The Art Of War*
You're so poor that you die and go to the backrooms.
Why could you not see the guy in my dark closet?
The guy was black.
Hey, I met you like way way back, just like your hairline.
Say my name if you like "Breaking Bad."