Year Jokes

In honor of Michael Jackson, Vienna Beef, as well as other establishments are introducing the Jackson dog. It's a 50 year old sausage between two 7 year old buns, with everything on it.

A mirror and a beer bottle are arguing The beer bottle says: if you break me you get one year of bad luck The mirror scoffs: oh, that's nothing, you break me and you get 7 years of bad luck. The condom overhears these arguments and walks off laughing

Did you know there’s black holes billions of years old? What’s more amazing is the black holes Stephen Hawking studied We’re only 14 years old.

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

My doctor said "you have 1year to live"

I said " you wanna bet"

Bam a gun shot

bin laden promised 76 virgins to al-queda

instead there was one 76 year year old virgin

"What did the blind, dumb, paraplegic, death eight year old child get for their birthday?"

"Cancer"

My Aunt visited and saw all of the stuff around the house my mom had kept over the years and said "If you have something that no one likes, and it only makes people upset, or its useless, throw it away." the next time my Aunt visited she said "Where is you daughter?" my Mom said "I took your advice"

The doctor gave me one year to live, so I shot him with my gun. The judge gave me 15 years. Problem solved.

My wife called me a pedo that's a big word for a 6 year old

My 2 year old Asian baby cant do calculus Look who in sweatshop now

In memory of Michael Jackson, Vienna Beef, as well as various places is introducing the Jackson Dog. A 50 year old sausage between 9 year old bun

A patient visiting his doctor asked him if he had ever laughed at a patient. The doctor said, "I have never in 25 years of practice ever laughed at a patient". Reassured, the patient drops his trousers and underpants. Immediately the doctor burst out into loud raucous laughter when he sees that the patient has a penis the size of a cocktail sausage. After about 10 minutes the doctor manages to get himself under control. Swiftly apologising he says to the patient, "Sorry about that. How can I help you?" The patient says, "Have you got any cream for it? It's swollen."

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

The Wine Taster At An Old Vineyard Died. A Homeless Guy, Looking Ragged And Dirty, Came To Apply. He Persuaded The Manager To Give Him A Try. The guy was given a glass of wine. He swirled, smelled, sipped and spit. “It's a red wine, Merlot, three years old, grown on the South Slope and matured in oak barrels." He said. "Impressive," said the manager.

The man is given another. "Still a red wine, Cabernet, eight years old, from the Northeast slope, stored in a steel vats.”

The manager was amazed. He winked at his secretary. The secretary understood and brought out a glass of urine. The drunkard tasted it and said. "It's a blond, 27 years old, three months pregnant, and if I don't get this job, I'll tell who the father is!"

In honor of Michael Jackson, Starbucks is introducing the Jackson Latte'. It's 50 year old coffee, with 8 year old cream. Get it while supplies last

Don't let mistakes drag you down. My dad made one mistake but it ended up fulfilling the 5 year plan of heat energy generation in less than a millisecond.