Twenty

Twenty Jokes

Salad

How do you make any salad into a caesar salad?

Stab it twenty-three times.

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  • Name

    Frank: "I am named Frank because my grandpa lived in Frankfurt during his best years."

    Finley: "I am named Finley because my grandmother was in Finland during her early twenties!"

    Mia: "Can we please change the subject?"

    Age

    What's the best thing about fucking twenty-one year olds?

    That there's twenty of them hoo hoo hee hooo harr haar dee harr harr

    Goldfish

    I had a goldfish that could break dance on the carpet... but only for, like, twenty seconds and only once.

    Memes

    Man

    A Person that puts a RickRoll in a book is actually the hero we all needed...

    A page of text detailing the life and work of Niels Bohr, a prominent figure in physics.

    Goldfish

    I used to have a goldfish which breakdanced on the floor. But only for like twenty seconds.

    Baby

    Q: How many dead babies does it take to change a lightbulb?

    A: I don't know, there are twenty in my basement, and my basement light still isn't fixed.

    Roblox

    One day in Roblox, someone was arguing with me, and they asked me my age. "18." They said that they were twenty-two.

    Me: "If you're so smart, what's the largest daycare game on Roblox?"

    Him: "Yo Hair," he said. Then he left the game, and I said, "That is so messed up. Actually, that's bullcrap."

    Age

    What’s the best thing about fucking twenty-eight year olds?

    There’s twenty of them!

    Woman

    What does an eighty-year-old woman have in between her boobs that a twenty-year-old woman doesn't?

    A belly button.

    Year

    Which legendary Dutch wanderer slept for twenty years, except when he got up to pee?

    Rip Van Tinkle.

    Alphabet

    How many letters are in the English Alphabet?

    Twenty-two. ET went home, P ran down his leg, and he took ME with him.

    Music

    When my mom said you have to listen to classical music at my new school, I had to listen to it twenty-four seven. After that, I sang the song [with] the wrong melody for my music teacher 😎

    Kid

    There once was a woman who had 10 kids. Their names were:

    Tenth, Twenty, Thirty, Forty, Fifty, Sixty, Seventy, Eighty, Ninety, and One Hundred.

    Everyone but Ninety died. She also had 10 kids.

    These 10 kids got a dog without Ninety knowing. They had him for 2 years until he got hit by a car.

    Only Ninety's kids know about this.

    Alphabet

    Dang... if I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put D IN U ;)

    I only know there are 25 letters in the alphabet, I don't know Y.

    (Me: How many letters are in the alphabet?) -- (Friend: 11- T-H-E-- A-L-P-H-A-B-E-T)

    (Me: There are 20 letters in the alphabet, right?) -- (Crush: No, there is actually 26.) -- (Me: oooOoh, I forgot u r a qt! So its acdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz?) -- (Crush: You forgot the D) -- (Me: That's not needed yet ;])

    What letter is really hot? T

    C = cOCK O = CoCK C = COcK K = COCk COCK = cock cock = COCK

    ME SExUAL SRrY LoL

    Sex

    What's great about having sex with twenty-eight year olds?

    There's ate of them.

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  • Sex

    What's the best part about having sex with twenty-seven year olds?

    There's twenty of them!

    Bus Driver

    You're the bus driver. The bus driver picks up twenty kids, drops two, picks up eighty. Drops seven, picks up a woman with green eyes, drops off a man with blue, kicks a kid in the face, and buried his mother.

    Who's the bus driver?

    You will never nose [know].