Woman jokes

There was an illegal alien woman who wanted to be called "undocumented." So, I had "undocumented" sex with her and threatened to have her deported if she reported me for rape. I'd call it even.

Do you know why I finger women with my left hand?

They don’t deserve rights!

Why can’t Indian women drive?

They’re too used to riding their camels.

A girl said to me yesterday, "I don't know why men act like they are better than women, we all know women are supreme." I was confused, so I asked her how, and she told me, "Well, us women have a pussy, ass, and tits, while guys only have a penis. Women have 3 things while guys only have 1. Women are obviously supreme over men." I told her, "Actually, guys have more than women." "How so?" "Men have rights."

I like my women how I like my wine: 12 years old and locked in a cellar.

Why haven’t any women gone to the moon?

A: It doesn’t need to be cleaned.

A woman walks into a supermarket and sees a blind man swinging a dog around in the air. So, the woman walks up to him and asks, "What are you doing?" The man says, "Just having a look around."

I got a job at a library once. I got fired like an hour in because the library manager said that the cookbooks didn’t go into the women’s sports section.

My opinion on abortion is very divided. Like, on the one hand, I like the idea of killing babies, but I'm not really into this thing about women being able to make choices.

I like my women like I like my wine: 12 years in a basement.

The Good Old Days.

You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older. Little things like being spanked every day by a middle-aged woman: Stuff you pay good money for in later life.

What do garbage bins and horny women have in common?

They wait to be filled with a big load.

What starts with a P and ends in S? (hint: men have it and women want it). Pockets.

It’s true women do make less money than men.

But it’s their fault because they choose the lower paying jobs. Men, for example, choose the higher paying jobs like doctor or lawyer. Whereas women choose the lower paying jobs like women doctor and women lawyer.

Women suck (GET IT?!)

What did Adam say when he saw Eve?

Answer: "Woman!"

what came first, The apple or the girl? The apple, because the tree left her hanging :)

What did the trans woman say after finally telling her parents about her surgeries?

“It felt really good to get that off my chest.”

So, a man finds a woman on a train track while he's on his way to a bar, and they had a lot of sex.

When he gets to the bar, he brags about the different sex positions they used, and one of the guys says, "Oh, did you do head?"

He responded with, "No, I couldn't find the head."

What do women and KFC have in common?

After you get done with the thighs and breasts, all you have left is a greasy box to put your bone in.